Does it feel like there's people just sucking the life out of you?
Earlier this year I was at a business seminar with one of the key note speakers being a Hindu priest and international speaker named Dandapani. I was dubious as what I would get from him, but he was a thought provoking speaker in many ways.
One interesting idea was looking at energy management in our lives. Personal energy is a finite resource, like money and we need to be wise in choosing where we spend that energy. Where your awareness goes, energy flows.
In order to manage the flow of energy we need to identify and deal with Energy Vampires in our lives.
Step 1 is to Evaluate the people currently taking up energy in your life
Are they Uplifting, Neutral or Not uplifting?
If they are not uplifting, are they an Energy Vampire?
If yes, are they Transient or Inherent?
Some people will go through periods of their lives where they may be an energy vampire, however this relates more to their current circumstances than their normal personality. We should support them in such periods and help them to get through it. They are Transient.
A person who Inherently drains your energy is one where you need to consider how to treat that person. Dandapani put forward the idea of being ‘affectionately detached’. This is to be kind and gentle, but don’t open yourself up to long, draining sessions. Don’t ask them an open question such as “how are you?”. Rather, stick to questions that you really want an answer to.
Put the burden of responsibility on that person. If they want your help, get them to email you a list of ideas. Give them a book to read that may help, then meet with them only after they have read that book.
I am all for helping people who genuinely need help. However, we must do so by making a conscious decision to do so, not because someone demands our time.
Life is finite, we need to be choosing wisely where we spend our energy. We should be clear on who and what is important in our life. This is relevant both in business and our personal lives.
Make a list of the people that play a significant part in your life.
Are they Uplifting, Neutral or an Energy Vampire?
How much of your time and energy do they take up?
Allocate the majority of your energy to those that are uplifting.
You can learn about Dandapani and his ideas at https://dandapani.org/
Take control; direct your energy and emotion to best use.